10. You Know, That One By The Author Who Writes All Those Crime Books, But Kind Of Literary? 9. Oh God, It’s Right On The Tip Of My Tongue - I Think It Rhymes With Horse 8. That Book - It’s Romantic, But Not Like Romance Romantic 7. It’s That One They Made Into The Netflix Series. Or Was It on Prime? …Tubi? 6. Honey, What Was That Book I Read On The Plane? No, Not To Chicago, To Florida 5. It's By That Guy...I Think He Died? 4. Oh Man. I Literally Just Finished It. Senior Moment! 3. Gosh…I’m Kind of Embarrassed To Say I Liked It. No Such Thing As A Guilty Pleasure Though, Am I Right? 2. Ahhhh…I’m So Close! 1. Um...Moby Dick? I Started Reading It This Year. I Mean, I Thought About Starting to Read It This Year.
Hello Dad, So Mom just sent me the song and...wow. I mean, first of all, the fact that you didn’t even send it to me yourself is just so *you.* You should make that the last verse of the song! But I digress. Let’s dive into some of these lyrics, shall we? Okay, so right off the bat, there’s this: “He learned to walk while I was away.” Really, Dad? You’ve always told me you were there for my first steps! There’s even a picture with what you’ve said were your outstretched arms I was supposedly toddling into. I have it framed on my desk right in front of me! And now I have to learn - in song form - that it was all a lie? Whose arms are in this picture, Dad? Speaking of lies, let’s move on to that baseball anecdote in the second verse. Why yes, I do recall when you gave me a baseball for my tenth birthday and then - when you had literally just given me a ball as a gift - you suddenly had “a lot to do” and didn’t teach me how to throw it! On my birthday! What kind of sociopath does tha